Google Guys Buy A Fighter Jet

Okay, so you and your buddies are billionaires and you’ve secured this sweet deal with NASA to use Moffett Field. Problem: The fleet of jets—even the one with the hammock, full-on Party To Go compilation, and yes Downtown Julie Brown when she’s available—have gotten boring. How do you up it a notch?

Sergey, Larry, and Eric Discuss Their Next Jet Purchase

Eric: How about Dassault/Dornier Alpha Jet which is half German and half French and 100% awesome cuz the Belgians use it. We can buy this one that was built in 1982. Great year for the Alpha Jet. Sweet wheels and Italian leather upholstery. 

Maverick: It’s too slow and too half queer, stupid Euro. Probably has baguettes where the controls should be.   

Grey Goose: I can see you’ve never met a pissed off Belgian.

Chappy: Guys, stop squabbling. It’s a trainer jet, so once we get used to flying it we can get something better. Perfect, right?

Maverick: Yeah and put Google cameras and guns on it and teach it to do math and make a Lego sound system for it and tell Chappy we’re doing it our way this time.

Grey Goose: And get drunk and try to give John McCain flashbacks with too-close fly-bys. Ooh! I bet we can make Ballmer crap his pants!

Chappy: No, we have to let NASA put doohickeys on it so they can do scientific experiments. It’s in